A Middle Aged Dinner Party

My husband and I hosted a dinner party this evening. There were six of us in all, couples ranging in age from 42 - 55. We enjoyed cocktails before dinner, a lovely BBQ, dessert and coffee. The conversation was lively and interesting and filled with laughter.

A few hours after dessert, the conversation turned -- as it always will with the 40+ crowd -- to the subject of health. One guy has a bad knee (gout), three people are diabetic, two have intestinal problems, one is hyperthyroid -- the list of ailments was long and each of us had a story to share.

Eventually, we began talking about blood pressure. Everyone told stories about their own blood pressure "normal." I suppose the conversation may have become a bit competitive: "Oh yeah, well my blood pressure is higher than YOUR blood pressure." and "My blood pressure is so low it's a miracle I wake up in the mornings." Suddenly my husband pulls out his electronic blood pressure gauge and one at a time, all the way around the room, every person there takes his/her blood pressure then passes the machine on to the next.

It suddenly occurred to me how funny this was....some people may pass around an after dinner smoke .... BUT A BLOOD PRESSURE MONITOR?

Now I know what old people do at dinner parties.

Seen on Markham Road Last Week

Sometimes I think my brother Joe would forget his head if it wasn't attached.

Proud to Be Canadian

Click the flag then "play" to view this stunning tribute to our Canadian heroes.

With thanks to Wade Penner for the Canadian Flag Clip Art Gallery.

Get over it! Hahahahahaha!

Bumper sticker seen today on a mammoth band bus and trailer motoring down the 401 west toward Toronto.

Blossom 1989 - 2006

Shannon's cat, Blossom, passed away today. Date of birth was recorded at the vet's office as June 1, 1989. Blossom had just passed her 17th birthday. She was Shannon's beloved cat for more than 16 years.

That damn cat pissed on almost everything we own. She has definitely left a mark on this world.

Chia doesn't yet realize that she's now an only cat.

I am SO Funny! Ask Roni, Ask Chris!

From a newsbite in a recent issue of Macleans:

"A new survey has found that more than half of younger siblings say they find it easy to be funny, whereas only a third of eldest children have the ability. More joyless are only children, among whom only 11 per cent say they're funny. The survey's compiler....says that younger children have to compete for parents' attention, and one device is humour. In contrast, older children are expected to take on more serious roles in the family, while only children have no need to aspire for parents' attention."

I sure as heck hope this isn't publicly funded science. Imagine some men and women wearing white lab coats with clipboards asking questions: "Do you think you're funny?" and "Where are you in family birth order?" Maybe these are the first results of the Turner Broadcasting System "Department of Humor Analysis," and Macleans thought it was news, right?

The New Mammogram Machine

Lakeridge Health in Oshawa (formerly, Oshawa General Hospital), got a new mammogram machine. I think this new machine must have been invented by a woman.

It's not like the old days where you had to put your breast in a vice and someone would turn the knob until it was as flat as a pancake. The original machine, I think, must have been invented by a man. A man who obviously hated his mother. Must have resented being bottle-fed or something.

This machine, I have to admit, was not the least bit uncomfortable. Although the technician could have given me a warning that I had to stop breathing.

On a related (and much more important!) note, my sister Roni is recovering comfortably from her surgery. The surgeons believe they got the entire lump but took only 2 of 3 cancerous lymph nodes. I think that can only mean good news: it must mean they believe they can get the 3rd node during radiation or chemotherapy.

We'll know more in a few weeks.

My Horoscope for Today

Libra (Sept. 23 — Oct. 23)

If everything in life were smooth running, straightforward and sensible, you'd be bored to tears. We all need a little chaos in our world. Granted, you've had more than your share lately, but that imbalance will get rectified soon enough.

Enough with the chaos already, please?

Source: The Toronto Star

Back to School Blues

I have the back-to-school blues.

But it's not what you might think: it's because, for the first time in more than 20 years, I am NOT seeing my daughter off to school. After five years of university, five years of high school, eight years of elementary school, and two years of kindergarten, we are NOT shopping for new shoes, school uniforms or colored pencils. NO last-minute late August hair cut, Sponge Bob back pack or looseleaf paper to buy.

This year, there's not even a "Bye Mom, off for frosh week, call you in a couple days" as she drives off, hatchback overflowing with blankets, groceries and homemade lasagne.

We didn't go to Grand and Toy, Staples or Wal-mart. The last five years our back-to-school ritual was a trip to Ikea. Not this year. I think the last store we went into together was Shopper's Drug Mart, to buy a wedding card for Shannon's university friends who were tying the knot this weekend.

Right about now, every year for the past five, I've cried as Shannon has driven off for a new year at university.

Today, on this back-to-school eve, I shed a tear because she isn't.